Thursday, April 05, 2007

Holy Thursday

This morning I rolled out of bed seriously grumpy. That word sounds too cute for the mood I was in, really- I was mad because I had to get up early and drive in to work for staff meeting. Not "regular" staff meeting, though, but "touchy-feely" staff meeting, which is a new invention at our parish meant to foster loving feelings between the staff and leadership. I suspect I'm not the only one who usually views these meetings as a waste of time- we're supposed to use this time to share and support each other but no one does- there is a general understanding that the less is said, the sooner we can all get out of there and back to our busy days.
Today was different because our pastors thought it "would be good" for us to meet for the Liturgy of the Hours before the meeting. And to boot- on this particular morning there was an additional blessing of an inch of messy, slushy snow... sigh.
Anyway, I took my seat in the church with my fellow staff members and a few parishioners, and I knelt to pray briefly. I asked God to help me find meaning and direction in Jesus' story this week, this Holy week, and to help me pay attention and receive his direction willingly, eeeeeeven if what He wants of me is not what I want.
I decided to really focus on the readings and prayers, each word- and I did. I heard about freedom from persecution, and I read that if we just will do what God leads us to do, He will stand behind us. Okay.
Ten minutes in to the prayer service, three of "my kids", high school seniors, walked in wearing sweatpants and sneakers and sat down in the pew ahead of us- one of the front pews in the church. I noticed that the staff members around me sort of sat up straighter, taking on "role model" mode. The kids settled in and figured out the prayer sheet, reading along with the Left side in the call and response. I was at once affirmed and convicted.
After the service we went off to TFSM and the kids went back to school. Now I'm here at home for the shower I never took this morning and a do-over for the day.
Happy Holy Thursday.

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